Up in Ontario

Sherrett Index

Average number of lists that, at any one time, you can find in my mother's house: 13

Number of those lists taped up in the kitchen: 6

Number of lists to keep track of the lists: 1

Number of people I know whose bathroom cabinets I have snooped through: 5

Chance that they know who they are: 40%

Number of junior hockey championships won, wearing #3 and playing defense with the Charleswood Hawks: 4

Number of years played with the Charleswood Hawks: 4

Times since my last game that I have worn my Charleswood Hawks #3 jersey: 2

Instances of 'Good hugger' that I have seen in resumes evaluated over my career: 1

Chance that I hired the 'Good hugger' candidate: 100%

Chance that content on UpinOntario.com is true in the conventional understanding of the word: 74%

Chance that anyone can define the conventional understanding of truth: 8%

Chance that anyone believes there is an alternate understanding of truth: 2%

Rank of West Vancouver of Canadian municipalities in terms of wealth: 1

Rank of Vancouver's downtown eastside for hepatitis and HIV infection in north america: 1

Estimate of the percentage of orders at Indian restaurants that include butter chicken: 24%

Estimate of orders that include naan bread: 86%

Number of trout caught on my new fly fishing rod: 1

Number of times I have told the story of the one trout caught on my new fly fishing rod: 14

Number of posts in the Up in Ontario Blog that the one trout caught on my new fly fishing rod generated: 3 (Part 1, Part 2, Part 3)

Number of times this week that I have been asked, "What is a blog?": 3

Chance that this is a rip off from Harper's magazine and that it has already been done by too many people who think that they too are clever: 100%

Number of people whose cleverness has exceeded this cleverness: 7