Up in Ontario

Breaking News: Sleep-Retardent Ex-Girlfriends, Nerds, Nude Stamps and the Environment

The fine folks of Mind Hacks blog, who are the same fine folks who wrote the Mind Hacks book, point to an article in Null Hypothesis (Title: No Rest with the Wicked, PDF file, 29 KBs) about breaking new empirical research by one researcher on having a sleep-retardent ex-girlfriend. The researcher, Ryan Baker, described as a human computer interaction researcher, was trying to find out why he was sleeping poorly, so he undertook a reseach project to pinpoint the cause with a regression model.

His conclusion? His worst sleeps were when he slept with his girlfriend. So what does he go and do? He tells her:

I concluded by explaining that, due to her sleep-retardant properties, I could not continue to sleep with her, an act she termed "breaking up". I should mention that Hermina suggested that my data, being from an observational study rather than an experimental study, only shows correlations rather than causation, and that it was quite possible that I had only chosen to sleep at her apartment on nights when I was less tired, or that I had actually chosen to get less sleep on nights when I had come to her apartment.

She proposed that, instead of taking hasty action, we conduct an experimental study where we flip a coin each night to determine whether I would sleep at her apartment or my own, in order to prove a causative effect. Obviously, I rejected this suggestion. Although this study is insufficient to conclusively prove Hermina's causative role, this strong a correlation, and the importance of getting enough sleep, are sufficient together to suggest that action needs to be taken expeditiously.

Just in case you're wondering, Null Hypothesis bills itself as the journal of unlikely science. But the article is definitely fo' real.

In contradictory news, nerds make the best lovers.

In Canadian news, Canada Post's efforts to let folks make stamps of their own photos hit a snag when a Calgary man wanted to use topless photos of his wife as stamps. Frederick Potter claims Canada Post is censoring him and his Ukranain-born wife.

"It's arbitrary censorship," he said. "Would a picture of a baby on a bearskin rug be considered child pornography? ... Where does it end? "Having Oleanna on a postage stamp is kind of a celebration of her becoming a Canadian."

In an e-mail to the Potters, an employee with the Canadian Bank Note Company, which partners with Canada Post to offer the customized service, said they couldn't approve of the image due to Canadian flag etiquette.

"We'd want to see a ruling by the Department of Heritage that, in this case, the flag is deemed to be displayed in a manner befitting this important national symbol," the e-mail said.

Frederick said a number of different images submitted, including a nude shot, were all rejected.

Oleanna, who moved to Canada over three years ago, said she is surprised by the response and is taking it personally.

"I feel like I'm in a very conservative country," she said. "We were just going to send it on letters to my family and friends in Ukraine. My family has a nude picture of me on their wall -- in Ukraine that's normal."

Canadian flag etiquette! First this, what's next in our Conservative country? Perhaps, writers silenced for speaking out on global warming? Oh wait, that just happened!

Minister stops book talk by Environment Canada scientist

Environment Minister Rona Ambrose has stopped an Environment Canada scientist from speaking publicly about his own novel.

Mark Tushingham has written a science fiction novel called Hotter than Hell.
It is set in the not-too-distant future when global warming has made many parts of the world too hot to live in and has prompted a war between Canada and the U.S. over water resources.

Tushingham was scheduled to speak in Ottawa about his book and the science underpinning it. But an order from Ambrose's office stopped him.

"He got a directive from the department, cautioning him not to come to this meeting today," said his publisher Elizabeth Margaris of DreamCatcher Publishers in New Brunswick. Margaris had driven from New Brunswick to attend the speech.

"So I guess we're being stifled. This is incredible, I've never heard of such a thing," she told CBC Radio.

A spokesperson for Ambrose said the speech was billed as coming from an Environment Canada scientist and even though his book is a work of fiction, he would appear to be speaking in an official capacity.

Tushingham was ordered to cancel the speech because he didn't follow the proper process, the spokesperson said. He also has cancelled some TV and radio interviews about the book.

Stephen Harper says he was not aware of the details, but his government was elected on a platform that included developing a new plan to deal with climate change.

"And I not only hope, but expect, that all elements of the bureaucracy will be working with us to achieve our objectives," he said.

Harper has been criticized for the tight control he wants to exercise on what Cabinet ministers and civil servants say in public.  He also opposes the Kyoto protocol, which could help slow global warming.

See also, from the Rick Mercer Report Rona Ambrose's silences on the environment as a priority (Apr. 11: Rick and Rona Ambrose making sweet syrup), which she should know, she's environment minister. I remember when Mercer did his show after the cabinet was announced. He got to Rona Ambrose as Environment Minister and said something like, 'that's like being in charge of getting the coffee around this crowd.'